Some find their purpose at the intersection of their true needs and their deep-seated values.
In this True Snack clip, Marianna Lead shares how she discovered this interdependence between needs, or as she calls them “essentials,” and values, what she calls “fuels.” And I share what I learned by reading her book, “Me, My Brand, and Why” and how I rewrote my purpose statement.
In this episode, Marianna answers the following:
- How can you find your purpose?
- What are the ingredients to purpose?
- How to write your purpose?
Marianna owns and operates Goal Imagery Institute, a International Coaching Federation (ICF) approved coach training program. She’s an ICF-Certified Master Coach, she’s a life-long learner, and she recently joined the podcast to share with us her passion for teaching...which for her is synonymous with learning.
Watch the full episode at https://youtu.be/HOHUPqCqSQ4?si=iEdd3smlxPtoGjra
Resources mentioned in this episode:
- Marianna’s book: “Me, My Brand and WHY: Infuse WHO You Are Into What's Most Important” https://bookshop.org/p/books/me-my-brand-and-why-infuse-who-you-are-into-what-s-most-important-marianna-lead-m-c-c/18565772?ean=9781458392541
- “First Break All the Rules” by Marcus Buckingham: https://bookshop.org/p/books/first-break-all-the-rules-what-the-world-s-greatest-managers-do-differently-gallup/594575?ean=9781595621115
- Marianna’s company: https://www.goalimageryinstitute.com/
Music in this episode created by Ian Kastner.
“True Snacks” is a series of excerpts from the "What Do You Know To Be True?" podcast. The purpose behind this series to share some of the key learning moments from the podcast.
"What Do You Know To Be True?" is hosted by Roger Kastner and is a Three Blue Pens production.
"What Do You Know To Be True?" is recorded on the ancestral lands of the Duwamish and Suquamish people. To discover the ancestral lands of the indigenous people whose land you may be on, go to: https://native-land.ca/
ABOUT THE PODCAST
Charting a path to purpose starts with a deeper understanding of one’s superhero power and how to make a meaningful impact in service of others.
This podcast is for anyone who helps other people unlock their challenges and achieve their potential. Our audience wants to think deeply about their work and how to increase the positive impact it has in service of others.
The goal of these conversations is not to try to emulate it or “hack” our way to a new talent. Instead, the intention is to learn more about their experiences with their superhero power, and in doing so maybe learn something about the special talent in each of us that makes us unique.
Our guests bring humility, insights, gratitude, and humor as they delve deep into their experiences, learnings, and impact their "superhero power" has had when used successfully.
The path to purpose: Ordinary people, extraordinary talent, meaningful impact in the service of others.
[00:00:02] One of the things I really enjoyed reading in your book is the connection to values, or as you call it fuel, and one's needs, or as you refer to it as the essentials.
[00:00:18] So could you tell us a little bit about what you've come to learn about the connection between a person's purpose, or their why, and their fuel and essentials?
[00:00:31] I couldn't find a connection, you know, a book that would, or a school, or a program that would offer a connection. Between who you are, your why, your how and your what, right?
[00:00:48] And so like for instance, Simon Sineck, I said, he wrote an amazing book, start starting with why. And I then started to try to work on my why, and I realized it's not so easy. It's just not because it sounds very easy but it's just not.
[00:01:10] And before you get to why, you really need to understand who you are first. And so there are tons of books on helping you decide to find who you are, and tons of books on personal branding.
[00:01:23] But none of them seem to connect with you, but they're like inseparable. And then need to be integrated within the same program. So the road to creating your why starts with who you are, and what you sell and what you do is the last step actually.
[00:01:44] Your question, who you who you are includes your fuels and your essentials. So a fuel is the value, but it's a very specific value.
[00:01:56] It's value that moves you to want to do something something also that is easy for you relatively easy for you because if it's easy for you, it means it's your thing.
[00:02:11] It means you're meant to do it. If it's easy, if you don't struggle to do it, it means you have a talent for it. Because I mean want to do other things like, you know, I love art.
[00:02:22] I love looking at painting, but I can't really paint for nothing, you know, like I just, you know, it's no right. So those are the fuels and they always joyful. It's always something that oh, I really do it well. Yeah, Marcus Buckingham in first break all the rules.
[00:02:44] When I read the book 20 years ago and I found that some of the research he did at Gallup showed that only 20% of people are actually able to use their strengths in any given day and defining strengths as something they're good at.
[00:03:00] But also something that gives them energy, something they're passionate about. And when I read that, it was heartbreaking. The idea that 80% of people are showing up to work and doing the thing they're probably good at, the probably the thing they get recognized for.
[00:03:15] And rewarded for and that probably feels good and probably the reason why that person had that thing at the top of their resume.
[00:03:23] But if it's not the thing that gives them energy then it's not a true strength and it's not something that the, you know, if they want to live a more fulfilled life
[00:03:32] for more purposeful life, they do need to remove that thing off the resume and they do need to focus in that area of not only the thing that they're good at but the thing that that that gives them strength. That gives them energy.
[00:03:44] And then when you combine it with the thing that, you know, creates value in the world that's needed in the world that's in service of other people. Now now I think you're on your pathway to purpose.
[00:03:57] It's not a simple and you use it exact phrase, perfect phrase gives you energy. So if you, it's something that gives you energy. And in essential, we came up with that word essential to replace the word need.
[00:04:15] Because there's just so many negative connotation with the word need as like being needy. However, it's true though, you know, because people who are not satisfying their needs slash essentials do show up as needy. And no one wants to be around the needy person.
[00:04:36] This is just it's such a turn off. Yeah. Oh, please hand me on your podcast. I really needed. I wanted. I can show up. You know, right? So you can do that. But it's going to happen. You're going to have that kind of show up.
[00:04:54] If you don't take care of your needs slash essentials consciously. So again, it's it's about work working with the coach ideally right? Because it's always quicker and quicker and easier and more effective to find what they are, to identify exactly what they are.
[00:05:14] And find positive ways to satisfy those needs to satisfy those essentials. So for instance, I pretty early on, you know, not that early, but in my 20s, I realized it my essential was getting attention.
[00:05:30] But my negative way of getting attention was being late like I was chronically late. And I didn't do anything and like everyone, it didn't matter what I was doing, who I was meeting.
[00:05:44] What it was and of course when you late, everyone stops and pays attention to you getting a lot of attention. The the attention is negative but subconsciously you don't differentiate. So your subconscious doesn't know negative from positive.
[00:05:58] It just knows that it gets what it needs and it needed attention. So it was getting what it wanted and is in a quickest way possible. So your subconscious will come up with a quickest way possible to get what you need, you know, your essential.
[00:06:12] And when you identify what it is that you can consciously come up with a healthy way of getting it done. So for people like me who need attention, maybe it's becoming an actress, you know, an actor, creating your own show. Becoming a speaker.
[00:06:30] So consciously thinking of ways to get attention in a healthy way. And so you asked me about the connection between fuels and essentials. If essential is not satisfied, you're just not going to have enough energy to to be fluid with your fuels.
[00:06:51] You're not going to be all your mind, body, all of your energy is going to be focused on satisfying those essentials because they're necessary for you to live. It's your emotional oxygen people that way and fuels is like when you were like already on the boat.
[00:07:11] And you have your sales up and you're moving and you're enjoying your own right? So that expression being in zone, that's what you feel when you're exercising your fuels. But so that it takes gross right? You have to balance essentials and fuels.
[00:07:34] I really appreciate you walking me through that. And as you were, what I've noticed in these podcast conversations I've been having, there is a very specific connection between people's superhero power. And they need that they have.
[00:07:53] And oftentimes it's an unmet need that the superhero power started off as a way of addressing that need. And then with practice, with time, with experience, it becomes a superhero power and then it becomes really meaningful when they are using that talent in the service of others.
[00:08:17] And I think we can draw and you kind of just did that connection between the essential that you have for attention. And using that, you know, fulfilling that as an actor, fulfilling that as a teacher and then finding who this teaching thing.
[00:08:37] This is really cool and then getting, yes, it probably, you know, with the combination of the fuel really lit that fire. And now with your class, with the workshops with the instruction you do in creating other coaches. Now you're in service of others.
[00:08:59] You know, you've kind of proven out your model and it resonates with me because it's what I'm witnessing here on these podcasts about how these pieces connect and a really, really exciting way.
[00:09:13] And I had the opportunity to actually do a little brand work with a client, a little over a year ago. And to prepare for that, I actually went and consumed a lot of materials about helping people create their brand.
[00:09:29] And I will say you're approach where you're connecting it to purpose and connecting it to people's needs and values is unique. And that before and so I wish I did. But now that I've had, I'm much better at being able to articulate that.
[00:09:45] But I actually played with it myself and I came up with my own statement. Do you want to hear it? Yes, absolutely. Oh my goodness. It's exciting. I believe I am unlocking my potential when I am working with others to unlock their potential.
[00:10:05] I love it. That's great. It's great. And it's tied to my fuel of having impact and you know, you in the book, you break out fuel by categories. And so there's impact in the word in there that really resonated with me as spark.
[00:10:23] And I think that's, you know, creativity innovation energy. But then also freedom. And the word under the freedom category was liberate. And I think it goes back.
[00:10:35] I was telling the story earlier about Mark is spucking him and that 20% of people, there's 20% of people out there that get to experience their strengths every day.
[00:10:45] Meaning 80% don't meaning that there's a lot of people that are like sort of tied in the situation that's not giving them energy that maybe make some feel stuck. And to me, I want, you know, helping people unlock their potential feels like liberating them from that experience.
[00:11:07] And then my essentials, my needs is to be acknowledged. And I've talked about that in terms of with, with my clients, like the thing I am looking for is at the end of the engagement for them to say thank you for the contribution I made.
[00:11:26] Now I'm getting paid for the work. I'm getting, I'm seeing the impact like I'm seeing all that stuff and that stuff's really valuable. But I've always known it's that acknowledgement is really important to me.
[00:11:41] So as I was going through the book and I'm like, yeah, yeah, my essential is to be acknowledged. And I can tie that back to an unmet need. And I'm sorry, this is begin to sound like a coaching session or maybe even therapy.
[00:11:57] When I was growing up, we moved every year and so from kindergarten through the end of high school, I went to eight different schools, lived in eight different towns.
[00:12:08] And so not only was I was the new student without a friend group at the beginning of every year, I also had a speech impediment. And I was pronouncing my arms as W's. So as the kid with the funny way of talking and the new kid.
[00:12:28] And I take away from that experience that, you know, I was being acknowledged but not for the right thing. Not for the thing I wanted to be acknowledged for and maybe even not seeing as someone who is valuable. And so this idea of the work that I'm doing.
[00:12:48] Yes, I want to be acknowledged but I want to be acknowledged for actually making a real impact, a real contribution to the lives of others. And I want to see that as where, you know, their unlock is tied to my unlock.
[00:13:03] And that gets us back to liberation because it makes me think of the little Watson quote, the Watson as an Aboriginal activist who is quoted as saying, If you've come here to help me, you're wasting your time.
[00:13:19] But if you've come here because you realize your liberation and my liberation are tied together, let's get to work. And that, that sparks joy and feel for me. Well, I mean, I'd like to acknowledge you for I'm sure.
[00:13:34] For all of these amazing thoughts and you such a great interviewer and it was easy to talk with you. And I really hope that we are going to jointly create impact. Your fuels and essentials are very close to mine, very close to mine.
[00:13:52] And no wonder we are, it's easy for us to talk with each other. And well, hey, you know, for the audience maybe you guys want neither workshop, maybe you'll be able to crack the code as easily as Roger did just by buying the book.
[00:14:08] So it's me, my brand and why it's available in Amazon, just type it up correctly and we'll come up. And just that's it. I'll leave us your recommendations and feedback and I would love to hear your wise.
[00:14:23] I would like to hear wise and what you come up with from all of our listeners, it's amazing. I think that this is speaking about impact.
[00:14:32] Just even that you read it and you inspired you to do the homework and actually get this done and you were telling me all of this stuff that you were just sharing. It's amazing. You know, so I'd like to acknowledge you for that work as a help.
[00:14:48] Well, you know when the student, when the student is ready.